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The Difference between Grief and Depression: How Are They Related?

Erika Krull, MSEd, LMHP 

 

Grief can hit hard, especially in the early moments of dealing with a loss. Your emotions can become so overwhelming that you might wonder if the sadness will ever go away. Depression can feel this way, too, and it helps to know the difference between grief and depression as you cope with your loss.

 

Grief can be uncomfortable, but in most cases you adjust to your loss and start feeling better over time. If you're still struggling for months, your grief may have developed into depression. While this may prolong your grief for a while, depression treatment can help. Here, we'll look at what a typical course of grief looks like, how it compares to depression, and some effective treatment options to consider.

 

What Typical Grief Looks Like

 

A typical grief experience includes several phases of emotion, each one showing a different way of coping with loss. These phases can include denial, anger, barganing, sadness, and acceptance. It's common to go through these phases in any order and often with phases occurring more than once.

 

Grief reactions come in waves with periods of adjustment in between. One week may seem calm, while the next could be full of emotional turmoil. Riding the ups and downs can be overwhelming at times, but these reactions are normal.

 

Your grief experience may follow some patterns, but your reaction to any particular loss is unique. Relationships, age, and life circumstances all play a part in how grief affects you and for how long. For most people, the first few weeks can be the hardest.

 

As the initial shock wears off, people start taking small steps back into their normal routines. Ups and downs are normal, but many people get engaged in their lives again after several months. Supportive relationships can help a grieving person find their new normal.

 

When Grief Turns into Depression

 

For some the grief can take a different direction. Grief can become depression when some of these symptoms linger or intensify:


  • Sadness
  • Loneliness and persistent longing
  • Isolation
  • Difficulty accepting a new reality
  • Numbness
  • Loss of meaning or purpose in life

Grief and depression share many symptoms and expressions. However, there are several ways to tell the difference between grief and depression. The difference often comes down to the duration and focus of symptoms. For example:

  • In Depression, symptoms can persist nearly all the time, while grief can come and go or you can predict when you may be feeling lower than usual, such as around your loved one's birthday or during the holidays.
  • Depression is often associated with feelings of worthlessness, while grief usually preserves self-worth.
  • Depression can cause someone to be inconsolable and isolate, while someone who is grieving usually accepts support from family and friends.
  • Suicidal thoughts are more commonly associated with depression than in grief.


There is substantial overlap between grief and depression. Previous distinctions between the two have been updated and no longer are considered mutually exclusive. If someone meets criteria for depression while dealing with a loss, the diagnosis of depression and treatment should be strongly considered.



One study of bereaved caregivers found that after about six months, up to a third of those experiencing grief met the criteria for major depression. A year after a loss, about one out of every four still had symptoms of depression. Whether you're experiencing grief or depression, it's important to get the care you need to start feeling better again.


Depression: Getting the Treatment You Need

 

Depression is common, but it can be harmful and may not resolve on its own. Whether depression is influenced by grief or develops for other reasons, it's a condition that requires treatment. Antidepressants and counseling therapy are the two most common treatments for depression. Each treatment can be used on its own, but they are most effective when used together.

 

If you are among the 30 percent of people who try antidepressants but don't feel better, you may be looking for other options.  Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS)  is a non-medication therapy that targets specific areas of the brain to reduce depression symptoms. A magnetic coil is placed near your skull to deliver brief pulses. These pulses are focused on areas of the brain that regulate mood. If you're still looking for relief after trying other treatments, TMS could be an effective option for you.



Find a Way to Move Forward

 

Grief is difficult for everyone. But if you can't move forward and feel like you're sinking, your grief may have turned into depression. Antidepressants and counseling therapy may provide what you need to recover from depression. TMS is another effective treatment method to consider as well, and you can reach out to Greenbrook TMS for more information. Sadness is a natural reaction to loss, but depression is a treatable condition that isn't part of typical grief. Get the support you need to keep moving forward.

 

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